I Lost My Sexy

Posted on February 11, 2010. Filed under: children, humor, marriage, Parenting, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , |

My swish has gone asway. I lost my sexy and can’t get it back.

It didn’t go away all at once, though. I lost my sexy a little at a time:

  • I lost my sexy when my husband brushed his hand across my hair. Thinking What a loving gesture, I was brought back to reality when he said, “There’s baby cereal in your hair.”
  • I lost my sexy when our standard form of birth control became a child sleeping between us, runny noses, and smelly diapers.
  • I lost my sexy when one of the junior high girls in the dugout asked my daughter if I was her grandma.
  • I lost my sexy when my waistline grew faster than my age.
  • I lost my sexy when I heard boys refer to my daughters as “HOT.”

Is there a lost and found for sexy? Can I take out a classified ad?

LOST: My Sexy, loving companion to middle-aged, graying mother of four. Last seen somewhere between childbirth and teaching teenagers to drive. Used to answer to complements by good looking men. Needs tender loving care, has sentimental value. Fragile: If found, do not expose to elastic waistbands, dirty diapers, hungry children, dirty laundry, or full-length mirrors.

This ad was paid for by the committee to restore my youth. Any contributions would be appreciated.

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11 Responses to “I Lost My Sexy”

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This was great! Can I add one?

“I lost my sexy when I started talking about poop at the dinner table.”

That’s a good one! How about I lost my sexy when my hubby chose a wild game feast over me for Valentine’s Day?
Well, maybe I should be asking wha kind of wild game he’s feasting on!
Or, how about I lost my sexy when the kids said “oooh, that’s gross!” every time my husband and I kissed for longer than 1/100th of a second!
Keep em coming!

Today a man told me that I didn’t look old enough to have a 15 year old daughter – so not focused on my sexy but apparently there is still some left in this olde broade! Giggle and snort!!

Laurel, That’s simply not fair, You Must Participate! You cannot hoard all of the sexy!

how about I lost my sexy when you look at yourself in the mirror and your little one comes up and says “hey you have two bums! One in the front and one in the back… WOW!”

Ouch! Out of the mouths of babes!

pshaw! you can only laugh 🙂

My first visit here and I’m loving it! I thought that baby cereal in your hair was supposed to be sexy? I guess I’m sadly mistaken! 🙂 Happy Valentine’s Day!

I think when it’s dried and chunky it loses some of its appeal!

Found you on twitter via the @thedailyblonde,

The perspective of the plea was done well, but unfortunately for you,looks like you will have to join the crowd of the sexless has beens.

Sometimes, though, I can suprise even myself.


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